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Be Careful What you Wish For…

I am sitting with tears streaming down my face and I am reminded that information is a powerful thing.

When we no longer have access to the one person we knew inside and out, we tell ourselves that just having a glimpse of their life after us is all we need to move on.  Sometimes, when we say that all we want is to know, all we really want is to not have to even think about it.

I recently moved in with a friend who knows my ex.  Yesterday while going through a bout of the “I miss hims,” I suggested coyly that she add him on Facebook. She was totally down, understanding my need to know what he was up to after going through the same thing with her own lost love.

It only took 12 hours.  Twelve hours and I went from knowing nothing about what he was doing and who he was with to being able to see pictures of the new love of his life.  The very girl who I had run into months ago when I got into a screaming match with him in the streets.

The girl who stood with her hands on her hips, rolling her eyes, and said, “Can we gooo babe?” That girl was being dipped romantically on the streets of Prague.  Smiling happily with the love of my life at dinner with his family.

That girl had everything with my ex that I ever wanted with him and that he had told me repeatedly that he didn’t want. And suddenly, I found myself thinking. I wish I didn’t know.

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Notes

  1. alana-maree reblogged this from thebreakupblogger and added:
    said it better myself. Sometimes ‘ignorance...this out the hard way…
  2. mayakamina said: This is why I don’t look. Ever. It’s too painful. :/ Great post.
  3. iamawasteland reblogged this from thebreakupblogger
  4. viconalia said: well put… I feel the same way, but it just causes more pain to know the things he’s doing with the girl he left me for, that he never did with me in our 3 years together.
  5. thebreakupblogger posted this